Create your own happiness, in just 4 easy steps.

Create your own happiness - Down with Steph blog

Create your own happiness, in just 4 easy steps.

Many of us want to lead happier, more fulfilling, lives, but the sad truth is that so many of us that wish for more happiness spend more time tending the happiness of others than we do tending to our own happiness. I could not be more guilty of this, and it’s something that I’ve learned to be better about.

The truth is happiness does not simply happen, a person does not suddenly stumble across happiness. In fact, happiness is the result of careful tending and a person who wishes to be happy must tend to their own happiness. Tending to your happiness does not need to be difficult, complex, or time-consuming. Making yourself a happier person really can be as simple as following these four steps:

1. Get rid of unhappy thoughts
Step one is an important one because unhappiness is a self-fulfilling prophecy. So getting your mind right is crucial.

Many people are unhappy because they don’t believe they deserve to be happy and they lock themselves into these holding patterns of behavior that make them unhappy.

So, take a minute to reflect back on what (and when) you think about things that make you unhappy. Is there a specific time of day that you tend to be more unhappy? Perhaps a specific task or routine seems to trigger your unhappiness? Or maybe it’s a person that triggers your unhappiness.

2. Envision yourself happy
Step two is about holding your vision. Some people have been unhappy for so long they have forgotten what happiness looks like and feels like. Envisioning yourself happy can help create happiness habits you need to make happiness happen. Thinking about your own happiness will also help counterbalance times when you are unhappy or working through unpleasant tasks. Think about difficult times as simply stepping stones to happy times.

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3. Fulfill your needs

Next is step three, it’s as basic as your need for food and sleep. If those particular needs are not met then you will not be able to focus on happiness. Obviously it is not impossible for hungry, sleep-deprived people to be happy, but most humans are a lot less likely to be happy in that state. Food and sleep provide fuel for both body and mind and the healthier your body and mind then the better chance you have to achieve happiness.

4. Fulfill your desires
Step four is the final step to achieving happiness. Allow yourself to dream big but don’t overlook small wishes and desires. While a two-week cruise might be great just having a weekend at a local resort might really give the rest, relaxation, and escape you might need. Or perhaps you’d really like to lose 30 or 50 pounds but finding a way to work in some exercise a few times a week might give you more immediate gratification while eventually accomplishing your long-term goal.

Make a list of your desires, wishes, and dreams — big and small — and keep that list someplace handy. Sometimes you don’t even need to accomplish your goals to achieve happiness. Sometimes it is simple enough to know that you are working toward your dreams. Often happiness is found on the path to our dreams. Often happiness is created while we strive to make our wishes come true.

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Once you identify the areas of your life that cause you unhappiness you can find ways to confront it and combat it. Sometimes you can make a change to avoid the trouble spot altogether, but when that’s not possible find ways to make it less difficult on yourself. Adjust your schedule or your expectations if that will make things better. Recruit help when you can. Just easing off one task or freeing up a few hours can make a huge difference in your attitude. When all else fails and you can’t change or share something unpleasant than don’t hesitate to give yourself a reward for accomplishing it. Knowing you will be rewarded can sometimes make difficult tasks more palatable.

Much love


4 Steps to Create Your Own Happiness

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